5 Steps to Calm
You know those weeks where you’re sprinting as fast as you can, all week long, only to miss the deadlines you’ve been sprinting to keep up with?
I’ve been having one of those weeks. Actually, I’ve had two of them, back to back.
For whatever reason, the Universe thought it would be a funny trick to put both my babies’ birthdays right at the end of IPP (IEP) season. This year, to make it even funnier, I planned Truth & Reconciliation activities for 300 kids, and agreed to do a presentation for my staff the day after my daughter’s birthday with only three days’ notice.
My natural reaction looks something like this:
But that reaction, though forgivable, doesn’t feel very good. And although there have been WAY too many things, I like all the things! So instead of freaking out, I’ve been very diligent about keeping myself in a positive space and calming my own anxiety. I’ve kept myself almost completely cheerful and only minimally stressed - which, given my week and my natural predisposition to anxiety, feels like a very big win.
Here’s how I’ve kept myself (mostly) calm through it all.
1. Meditate, meditate, meditate:
I’ve learned the importance of my morning meditation the hard way, and now rarely miss it. I spend 20-30 minutes in silence, focusing on my breath or a mantra. During weeks like these ones, my morning meditations are often “beditations,” but I turn on the lights and set interval timers to keep myself alert.
If you’re new to meditation, I’d encourage no more than 2 minutes each morning until you have a routine in place. Even this tiny change will make a noticeable difference. If you’d like a (free) resource, try the Insight Timer app.
2. Daily emotional tune-up:
In Eat Pray Love, Elizabeth Gilbert tells of a man who advised her to choose her thoughts each day like she chooses her clothing. I do exactly that.
What exactly does this look like? I spend a few minutes each morning (say, ten-ish?) in my journal, deliberately choosing thoughts that feel good. I begin by setting an intention for how I would like to feel, and I write that down. Then I write a list of ten or twenty thoughts that help move me in that direction.
For example, if I want to feel calm and at ease, I might remind myself that things are always working out for me. If I would like to feel joy or bliss, I count my blessings and remind myself they continue to come my way. The thoughts have to feel true- if I’m feeling completely overwhelmed, I might write that I feel that way less often lately.
Everything just seems to go a little bit more smoothly when this routine is in place!
3. On-the-fly resets:
Thanks to my diligent meditation practice, I’m now quite aware of how my body feels at any given moment throughout the day. When I notice anxiety rising - muscle tension, thoughts coming faster and faster, changes in my breathing - I know to slow my breath by pursing my lips and exhaling, as if I’m breathing out through a straw. If you’ve never tried it, this trick is magic. It allows my mind and body to reset, and keeps the anxiety from escalating.
As simple as it sounds, It has taken me years to cultivate the ability to stop and breathe. So if it seems impossible to you, believe me: I get it. I encourage you to keep trying, because eventually it does become a very helpful strategy.
But if that doesn’t feel like it ‘works’ right now, try this instead: plant a reminder in your phone or a sticky note on your water bottle to interrupt yourself for planned check-ins throughout the day. Have something funny or heartwarming at the ready that can lift your spirits in next-to-no-time, and then move on with your day. Even teachers can do this. It takes 5 seconds!
4. My morning tea
If I’m being honest, I stop for tea every single morning. I drop off my kids, and I stop by the nearest location of a well-known Canadian coffee shop. I admit that I do feel the occasional tinge of guilt here, because I would much rather support a truly local business owned by the person making my glorious morning beverage. Currently, that’s a splurge reserved for the occasional Friday, instead of the norm.
But still: beginning my workday with a small luxury genuinely brings me joy, each and every day. I am deeply committed to my own personal happiness, and this little boost matters. It probably only works because I’m heavily meditated and deeply, deeply grateful. But it works. If it works for you too, I say do it!
5. Seeking calming spaces
Even in the most demanding weeks, I prioritize visits to calming spaces. My chosen spaces change based on the season and how I’m feeling, but include my favorite yoga studios, the riverside path through my favorite park, and hot baths with bubbles, music or a good book. What matters here is that these spaces already are calm, all by themselves. By being in them I become calm as well.
The past two weeks have been exceptionally busy, but I still made it to yoga and spent some soul-filling hours in the park with my children.
An important note: these tips are for the day to day stress brought on by the inherently overwhelming nature of teaching in today’s classrooms and living in today’s world. They work! But they aren’t enough for a crisis on their own. If life is too much, seek support in whatever way you can: your doctor or a therapist are a good place to start.
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